Dave's Good Stuff

I know this. I’ve known this for decades. Now my finger knows it too. Graphic pictures after the cut…
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Last year, my focus was on getting as many miles in as I could. I had twin goals of increased fitness and minimizing the use of my car, at least insofar as getting to and from work.

This year, I’m simplifying a bit. Both life at work and life at home have changed, and I’m in a position where I have need of my car during the day while at work, and during the evenings while at home. That makes it difficult some days to ride in. I’m the first to admit that the frigid temperatures have something to do with it. As I said, I just don’t care for riding in the cold. Moreover, I’m still fighting a very persistent and frustrating low grade sinus infection, which I don’t want to exacerbate through exposure.

However, I’m going to maintain my goal of increased fitness. That has always been my primary goal, and was why I started commuting by bike to begin with. So.. this morning was the beginning of something a little different. Since I won’t be/can’t be riding my bike to work every day, on those days I don’t ride on the streets, I’ll roll.

You may recall I recently conquered the unassisted mounting on the rollers. I’ve rolled a few times since then, but not regularly. This morning was the first morning that I put into action my plan to roll when I don’t ride. Every day I will either roll, or I will ride. Also, for the record, I will be keeping stats, and won’t distinguish between roller training and road/trail training. I believe the miles are relatively accurate when I’m rolling, but who cares. It’s more about time and effort, speed and heart rate, than actual distance. Still… I’ll keep track.

Moreover, at least three days a week I will do some strength training in my home gym. I did such a thing this morning, for instance.

This afternoon, since I won’t be riding my bike home, I will roll again.

Every day. It’s either ride, or roll. Roll or ride. One, or the other.

Those mountain passes are looming, and my brother is training hard. I have to keep up.

Of course, I also have to rid myself of this… how did I put it… very persistent and frustrating low grade sinus infection. I’m officially tired of it. I’ll go back into the doc this morning and see what they can do. Again.

After having seen the video today of duder mounting and dismounting the E-Motion Rollers, I decided that I was tired of having to rely on walls to balance myself when I, myself, mounted the rollers. I decided I was tired of having to use a crutch to get started on my indoor workouts. I decided that I was tired of requiring assistance in order to get the aluminum drums rolling and my wheels flying on them. I decided that I was going to learn how to ride them alone.

Without aid.

Without hesitation

And without fear.

And on my own.

Imagining myself mounting the rollers as effortlessly and naturally as the honorable man in the video, I set about slowly and patiently. I took heed to his example and first mastered the initial spin. I spun the wheels and balanced the bike until the rollers stopped and the bike threatened to fall. I did this until I could perform the maneuver as easily as switching from G to C in the first position.

Then, just as slowly, and just as patiently, I began to move my left foot to the pedal. Not to clip in, no, but only to increase my confidence that I could clip in if I so desired. I practiced this until it came just as naturally as the initial spin, as if moving from C to F.

Finally, having mastered the first two movements, I began work on the third. All the thousands of times I’ve clipped in while on the road gave my left foot the knowledge it needed to find the pedal, clip in and before I knew it, without even having to tell my leg to push, I was spinning. The move from F to A minor was mine.

I was spinning. I’d gone from A minor back to G. Without aid. Without hesitation. Without the use of a wall, or a crutch, or a helpful hand. I had done it.

And I had done it.

On.

My.

Own.

(so now I reward myself with a glass of Pinot Grigio, some corn chips, and Babylon 5 – so much for 50 minutes worth of rolling)

So, in case you haven’t noticed, it’s pretty cold. It’s been in the single digits for a while now, and in case I haven’t mentioned it, I’m not a fan of riding in the cold. My excuse the last week or so has been b/c I’ve been sick with a minor upper respiratory tract infection. My excuse this week is that it’s Christmas week, and as such, is pretty hectic. My excuse next week will be b/c it’s New Years, and I’ll be very tired because of it.

I know, those are excuses, not reasons. After all is said and done, the truth is if I wanted to, I’d find a way. But unlike others, I’ve had to face the cold (ha!) harsh reality that riding in the sub-zero cold is too harsh for me. I won’t whine about why it’s too harsh for me, suffice to say that for daily outings, it just is. Riding should be fun. Riding in tear-freezing temperatures, at least for me, isn’t. That’s my burden to bear, and I bear it without shame.

But that leaves me with a problem. I do love to ride, and I love the benefits of riding. I’m healthier and happier. That’s what got me into it to begin with, after all, and that’s what will keep me in. But how to ride when the weather doesn’t allow, or when one allows the weather to stand in the way (as is my case)? There are three main choices… stationary bikes, trainers, and rollers.

I prefer rollers over stationary bikes and trainers b/c rollers force you to stay balanced, while the more traditional trainers keep you upright on their own. Rollers train your riding form as well as your fitness level. I currently have a set of rollers I use when it’s too cold out, but they aren’t perfect. They’re not bad, mind you, as far as rollers go, but they suffer from the same thing most other rollers suffer from… they’re rigid. They just sit there holding the wheels in place, and as such, they don’t feel natural. Sure, you can move side to side, and mine have wheel guards to keep me from rolling off the cylinders, but there’s no forward/backward motion, so it feels stiff and unforgiving. Moreover, they don’t allow for out of the saddle sprinting very well. Once I’m up and rolling, I’m stuck in the saddle until I stop.

I’m here to tell you, that’s not natural at all. My future gf/fiance/wife will appreciate the benefits of occasional out-of-the-saddle riding.

The other problems rollers present are all easily overcome.

• Bored? Sit them in front of a television (or sit a television in front of them). Better yet, sit them in front of a television with a DVD player attached. If that’s not your thing, put on some music and ride to the rhythm.
• Getting too hot or staying too cold? You’re indoors… I’m going to assume that being able to afford a bike and rollers means you can afford to control your climate. You can always put a fan up to give you the illusion of wind (or to just keep you cool). Consider a headband to keep the sweat out of your eyes. If you’re rolling as you should be, you’ll sweat.
• Can’t mount or dismount? Well… this remains a bit of a struggle for me. I still need a wall for support, but I’m making it a goal for January to conquer that weakness. More on that later…

However, as I said, the one thing I’ve found that the rollers simply don’t do is feel natural. In a fixed position on the ground, they don’t let the bike move naturally as you pedal, which (unless you’re like me and have a perfectly flawless stroke), becomes very obvious after the first few revolutions. This fixed position also makes it difficult to stand up while riding. Not impossible, but you have to be really really careful and know what you’re doing. I’ve not tried it yet, b/c I’m not keen on launching myself off the rollers and into the television stand. Maybe someday…

And that’s why I really want to find myself in possession of an E-Motion Roller. The videos on the site highlight the natural movement of these rollers, as well as the bumper system that makes out of the saddle and in the saddle equally natural.

The only problem is that they’re not cheap. Still, one gets what one pays for, and since I’m dead set on hitting the mountains again next year, not to mention staying in shape in the meantime, I’m seriously considering dropping the not-insignificant cash for these things. Perhaps the most important point, however, is that since they’re good enough for The Fat Cyclist, they’re certainly good enough for me.

In the meantime, I’m looking forward to trying out the mount/dismount technique shown in the last video on their video page.

I’m home again today on account of throat crud. About halfway through my ride home yesterday, I felt a familiar soreness when I swallowed. I rejected it it out of hand. Nope. Not going to happen again, not so soon. I can’t remember the last time I was sick, but I don’t think it was that long ago.

Blah. Doesn’t matter. I’m home now, and it’s snowing out. Today would have been a fantastic day to ride! But the way it’s snowing, I’m sure I’ll have tomorrow as well.

BTW, the answer to yesterday’s question is Steven Brust. I *love* the communication style between his characters.

Though I be in Texas, far away from home and the bike that awaits me, new and unridden, with virgin saddle, as it were, my thoughts stray now and again, all the same, to the subject of cycling. I think on how nice it will be to once again sit astride the saddle, my arms outstretched holding brake levers and handlebars. I think on how nice it will be to see my waistline diminish once again, rather than continue it’s current trend of slow expansion. I think on how nice it will be to once again stride out the front doors with pride, knowing that I will be making it home on my own power, while at the same time clowning around like a fool for the cadre of lustful (though unfortunately married) women who have come to be a sort of 4:30pm Fan Club for yours truly (I take the ego boosts where I can get them). But lately, one thought presses forward as I spend minute after empty minute in the cabin of an automobile instead of the saddle of a bicycle… that thought is what I will share with you now.

And here it is, then.

That thought is patience.

More than a healthier body (and the unabashed admiration of womenfolk all across the lands), more than all those things I mentioned above, cycling has given me patience.

I tool about in my car, making my way steadily and surely to my destination, watching in bemused awe as drivers around me scream about (literally and figuratively both), forcibly changing lanes at the last minute, riding bumpers in unabashed displays of apparent superiority, verily burning valuable rubber off at stop signs and stop lights in a desperate attempt to get to the next stop sign or stop light that much sooner, and generally behaving like a group of angry baboons… all in the name of shaving valuable seconds off their commutes.

I used to be one of them. I used to scream at others who behaved in ways not to my liking. I used to drive as aggressively as defensively. I used to speed everywhere I went. I used to strain the engine and the brakes both starting and stopping. I used to be one of them. But I’ve spent a lot of time on the roads in a saddle this year. I’ve learned first hand the energy it takes to go uphill, to start from a stop and to increase to a higher speed. I’ve gained a sense of what my car must be experiencing when I demand of it the same. I’ve learned how it feels to be truly vulnerable on the roads, though my vulnerability has not (as of yet, thankfully) been tested. I no longer consider myself one of them.

I’ve also gained what I believe is a relatively rare sense of time as it relates to distance and traversing said distance.

And this is my point.

It takes a lot longer to get from point A to B on a bike than a car (assuming a distance of any significance and without a maze of stop lights). I’m used to taking that extra time, so now as I’ve found myself behind a wheel more than on a saddle lately, I’m far more patient being behind the wheel, knowing that I’ll get there if I relax, take my time, pay attention, and avoid daredevil behavior. I know what it’s like to take a long time to get home. Driving a car home takes no time at all.

A side benefit, in addition to the lower blood pressure and overall better demeanor is that the learned patience cycling has taught me gives me a better chance of getting where I’m going safely. Not bad as far as side benefits go.

So, by way of clearing my head and getting some miles, I took off last night on a quickie 33 miler over some of the best hills that Johnson County has to offer. At least, insofar as I know. If you know of others that aren’t on this route, please… do let me know.

Due to some aforementioned chaos, I wanted to get out and clear my head some. Unfortunately, before I could clear my head, I first had to fix (yet another damn) flat. They’ve been plaguing me lately. It seems every time I want to get out and ride these days, it’s either one tire or another, on one bike or another. It’s tiresome. Last night, it was last-straw sort of frustrating. I found the hole, didn’t find anything in the tire, replaced the tube and admittedly amidst a small amount of cursing, finally got out the door.

It didn’t take long for my mind to turn away from flats to the issues at hand, and turn it did. Over the course of the 33 miles, I did exactly what I set out to do…

1) Get miles in. Not many, but every little bit counts.
2) Confront my current personal demons. Again, not many, but they’re mean and they have spiky forearms and big horns.
3) Deal with those demons and claw my way out of the dark place I’d found myself in.

All three goals accomplished, insofar as one can over the course of a couple hours, I rolled slowly into the driveway, tired from pushing the hills and in a much better place.

The rest of the evening was relaxed. I had dinner, watched Heroes, and played with my online spreadsheets a while before heading to bed. For some reason, I went downstairs again and looked at the tires to make sure they were still pressurized. Nope. The previous flat had returned.

You have got to be kidding me. Again?! Another?!

That was it. I was done with it. I wasn’t going to stop until I find the culprit.

Filled up the sink with water. Aired up the tire and spun it in the sink until I saw air bubbles. I found the hole, stripped out the tube, and *very* closely examined the tire this time for little poking things. I was in a rush before and didn’t notice, but sure enough, there it was… a *tiny* little metal fragment buried in the tire. The pressure of the tube was enough to cause a puncture, but otherwise, it was all-but-invisible.

I got that little demon out. It took a while and I had to dig deep to get it, but I got it out.

What would possess a dog, an otherwise seemingly intelligent quick learning dog, to eat a box of staples? An entire box of staples? Then, having eaten said box of staples, what would possess same dog to puke them up on not one, but two carpets, as well as the hallway where everyone walks? Then, having puked in the three aforementioned locations, what would possess this dog to puke in his own bed?

The GF has him at the vet right now looking into surgery options. The X-Ray showed two huge clumps of staples bound up in his stomach. They won’t easily or safely pass given that they’re clumped up like that, so surgery is a necessity. It won’t be cheap.

It’s been a great morning.

Update: Surgery is going to be a lot cheaper than we thought, and within reason. He has a fist sized chunk of tangled staples in his gut right now that won’t pass, so it’s either surgery or sleepy time. The GF is opting for surgery.

I gave blood today. It was my first time. I know… I’m a bad person. I should regularly give blood. For someone with a BSW, you’d think I’d be more charitable, wouldn’t you?

Well.. I gave today. So hush.

The actual experience was pretty tame. I filled out a questionnaire, and then they took my temperature and blood pressure, and checked my heart rate and hemoglobin. Everything was within the necessary limits, so they made me drink a bottle of water and eat a donut before they’d stick me. Having done their bidding, I laid down on the gurney and they stuck me with a needle. Not just any needle, mind you, but a huge needle with a cavernous gaping maw in the business end that spoke to me from the depths of Hades, demanding, what else but, a blood sacrifice. The nurse, oblivious to the dialog between the needle and I, simply asked me to squeeze a little stress ball for 5 seconds on and off.

While I was squeezing, I had to wonder about the implements they were using. Some of them looked like legitimate torture devices. There were these pliers on the instrument stand next to the bandages and plastic fangs that had the look of pliers one might find a fellow named Guido approaching you with after he’d beaten the pus out of you for stiffing his boss on last months protection racket. I didn’t ask about them. I really didn’t want to know.

Having appeased the Needle God, I had a small cup of RC and a few Nutter Butters. I felt ok, but they insisted. The nurse was impressed with my choice of RC. She grinned and said I was “Old School”. It was honestly the only glimpse of personality I saw in the staff. I guess they get tired of dealing with people throwing out the same old jokes day after day. Plus, I guess when you’re handling people’s blood in one hand and large gaping needles in the other, it’s probably best to be totally serious all the time. The last thing you want is to bust up laughing at some dillwad’s jokes, only to stab him in the throat with the needle, or stick the bag and have his blood dump out all over your nice white apron.

All in all, not an unpleasant experience.

One of the guys after me had a bit of a bleeder. They took the needle out, and the blood just kept on coming. It wasn’t that bad, actually, but I had high hopes. I was hoping to at least watch the little cotton balls fill up red one after another. Better still would be spraying jets of blood coating the walls with crimson horror while he jerked around in some spastic dance of terror, screaming and crying like a newborn, his convulsions tearing through the room like Katrina through New Orleans.

Oh well, you can’t have everything…

My heart rate was 68, which is high for me. I was resting, but maybe I was a little nervous, what with it being my first time, and it being only about an hour since my ride in. Also, my blood pressure was 140/70. I don’t mind the 70 part, but the 140 bit is worth watching. I’ve never had high blood pressure, but the last time it was checked about 3 months ago, and then today, it was elevated a bit. Both times, however, it was checked right after at least one cup of coffee, so I’m going to keep a cautious, but unworried eye on it. Maybe the caffeine affected my heart rate as well…

Now I’m back at my desk, my arm bandaged up tight. If I start to fade in and out over the course of the day, let someone know, would you?

Allow me to call your attention to a post by a friend of mine…

Most specifically, I’m impressed and inspired by this:

I’ve been told by some that I have near-inhuman willpower. I don’t know about that. I might have a lot of willpower, but I think mostly it’s just that I know (I don’t “believe”–I know) that I am in control of my body. My body’s laziness, cravings, and other unhealthful desires don’t control me. I might cave in to them sometimes. Life’s too short to be strict all the time. But usually I treat my body, not as a temple, but as a machine that carries my brain around and does for me what I want it to do.

… and this:

Make a commitment to yourself to be fully aware of your body and in control of your body for twenty minutes a day. During those twenty minutes, make your body work for you. Make it work hard! And when the twenty minutes are up, don’t reward it with unhealthy food. In fact, don’t reward it at all. After all, it was only doing was it was designed to do in the first place. You’re just reminding it of the fact.